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Being There How To Love Those Who Are Hurting

Written by Ed Stetzer on . Posted in Ed Stetzer

An interview with Dave Furman on his new book.

Ed: What is your book about and who is it for?

Dave: Being There is a book about how to love those who are hurting. It’s a book for all of us because all of us have friends, family, neighbors, or fellow church members who suffer from disability, depression, or sickness. It’s not a book about suffering, but a book on how to care for the one suffering.

Ed: What prompted you to write a book on this topic?

Dave: What tipped me over the edge to write Being There was when I realized that while my physical pain and emotional distress is difficult for me, that it doesn’t just affect me, but all of the people around me. I’m disabled. I have a nerve disorder and I have very little use of my hands.

About ten years ago, as we made our plans to move overseas to plant churches, my arms just stopped working. That began a time of deep depression and trial. At one point, I had boils on all of my fingers and couldn’t use my hands. I couldn’t eat with a metal fork, button my shirt, or touch hardly anything at all. I mourned the loss each day and every time I woke up, I simply looked forward to the end of the day when I could lay back down.

I think about the dark nights of the soul I had. While that was awful for me to experience, it was also very stressful for my family. As I paced up and down our bedroom floor during some of those nights, my wife was awake in bed pacing those same floors with me in her heart.

There were days when she didn’t know if her depressed and disabled husband would ever be joyful or healthy again. Those who care for the hurting need to be reminded of God’s care for them in their pain, just like those who suffer need those reminders, too. We need hope and practical help. I wrote ...

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